


Winter is Coming...So is Stark

by MysticMedusa



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Flirting, Fluff, M/M, cheesy pickup lines, slight crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 06:19:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10803504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysticMedusa/pseuds/MysticMedusa
Summary: The avengers are left questioning how Tony ended up such a successful playboy when he says such cheesy lines. Thor's confused, Winter's confused, face palming all around, and Bucky has to explain some things to his scary alter ego





	Winter is Coming...So is Stark

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Namida_Kira](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Namida_Kira/gifts).



> Namida_Kira not sure if this is exactly what you wanted but I hope you like it

Avengers are earth’s mightiest heroes, Captain America a national icon, Black Widow a feared assassin and spy, Hawkeye a trained archer who never missed, Hulk the giant green rage monster fighting alongside heroes, Winter Soldier a former assassin for Hydra trying to redeem himself, Thor a prince and god of thunder, and Iron Man…we don’t talk about Iron Man, why you may ask? Because cheesy horrible pickup lines. It’s a wonder how he ever became a playboy.

The first example of this for the man who flirted with everyone who was of legal age was the night Natasha offered to help Pepper with one of the galas Tony had weaseled his way out of. She was wearing a black dress with matching heels and about to head out when Tony caught sight of her from where he was sitting with the other avengers.

“Are you Cinderella? Cause I see that dress coming off at midnight.” He said with a flirty wink at Natasha.

Natasha stopped dead in her tracks, Clint and Thor who were closest to Tony backed away to avoid being killed when Natasha made her move, and Winter who was currently in control just stared looking slightly confused as he was trying to understand why the dress was coming off at midnight and who Cinderella was.

Natasha just stared at Tony for what seemed like far to long before she turned away and left.

“Holy shit you made the black widow speechless.” Clint gasped wondering how Tony wasn’t dead right now.

Tony grinned. No one seemed to notice Winter still trying to make sense of his words. The next time Tony had a cheesy pick up line it was to Thor who was sitting in the kitchen eating breakfast with Bruce, Clint, and Winter.

“Morning friend Tony.” Thor greeted.

“You must be one hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room.”

Clint groaned and Bruce face palmed hard. Thor just stared confused while Winter was again trying to find the meaning behind Tony’s words. The genius just grinned and walked in to get his coffee. Thor didn’t even bother trying to find the meaning behind his words because according to the god nothing could explain Tony Stark.

It was clear that all of them were going to be the victim of Tony’s cheesy pick up lines. Clint’s turn came when he, Steve, and Winter were sitting down to watch a movie. Clint was so distracted he didn’t even notice that Tony was nearby.

“Your ass is so nice it’s a shame you have to sit on it.”

Clint jumped off the couch surprised by Tony. Winter looked at Clint’s ass and shrugged.

“<I’ve seen nicer.>” He said in Russian, it was one of the few ways to tell the difference between Bucky and Winter.

“Hey I take offense to that.” Clint said understanding the assassin.

Said assassin didn’t seem to care and his gaze following Tony’s ass as he sat down went unnoticed. Of course next to fall prey to his horrible lines was Steve while they were getting ready to spar. It was a team activity so they were all gathered and it was one of the few times they were going to train with both Bucky and Winter. The former being out currently.

“You’re eyes are blue like the ocean and baby, I’m lost at sea.”

Steve threw his hands into the air and demanded a different sparring partner. No one but Winter was willing to switch and he just looked confused as to how Tony was lost at sea when he was right there in the gym with them.

The avengers were all certain Bruce or Bucky was next to receive the ridiculous flirting. They were all thankful they hadn’t put bets on it because they all would have been wrong. The avengers alarm went off and they were once again having to deal with Thor’s insane little brother. He was trying to destroy the city again and no one could get near him for the most part. Finally Tony got close and the god taunted him into attacking. Instead of attacking like he should be another of his cheesy pick up lines came.

“Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you everyone else disappears.”

The entire team minus Winter and Thor groaned loudly. Loki stared confused, opened his mouth then closed it again, and then just blinked at him. Apparently Tony broke the god because he left and didn’t resurface for a while. The avengers had just stared at Tony who wasn’t even acting like he’d just stopped one of the most dangerous and annoying super villains with a horrible pick up line.

It was during their next mission this time against Doom that the next line came. Again directed at the villain.

“Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?”

Doom had stared at him while several people face palmed or considered attacking their own teammate to put an end to the horrible flirting. Doom had laughed.

“You have amused Doom enough that he shall attack another day.” And with that the evil cloaked figure left taking his doom bots with him.

As the avengers headed back to the tower both Thor and Winter looked confused having felt no earthquake. Thor had asked Natasha about it later while Winter had finally decided he didn’t like being confused anymore and wrote a note to Bucky asking for the meaning behind the words. Bucky had face palmed and wrote back to his alter ego telling him the concept of pick up lines.

Later when they were gathering for another team bonding activity Bucky had wished Winter luck on his mission. Tony hadn’t yet hit either the assassin or Bruce with a pick up line but those who understood what was happening knew it was coming. Of course none of them could have predicted Winter of all people finding a line to use on Tony.

“<Those are nice jeans, do you think I can get in them?>”

Those who were drinking(Natasha, Clint, Bruce, and Steve) all choked on their drinks or had it coming out their nose. Tony was staring wide eyed like an excited child who just got their birthday and Christmas all wrapped into one.

“Oh my god your my favorite!” He said jumping into the assassin’s arms. “Get into my pants or wherever else, I’m ll yours babe.”

Winter carried off with the genius and while most of the others stared in shocked silence Clint couldn’t just leave it alone.

“Winter is coming…and so is Stark.”

Clint deserved the kick in the balls he received from Natasha. Thor was still confused and Steve was having a terrible time getting that image of his head that he almost kicked Clint in the balls to.

 


End file.
